as someone that sees them as sort of 'not really a part of me because they're 'the boobs'', i'd advise getting a reduction and not a complete mastectomy. because of your situation and the nb ness of it and binding, and just the size and all that, it's less of a blow/adjustment to go from an i (i'm the h anon) to something like a d. they're still there/large, but they'd be bindable then (though i'd suggest asking for a c since that's where i think i'd be more comfortable than where i'm currently at). you'd still have boobs, still have to bind them, but they wouldn't be this 'presence' in your life that i find large breasts tend to be. it might make it easier for you to handle having them if they just aren't so much. and there's nothing saying you can't get a secondary operation after, but it's easier to take off more later than regret having so much gone.