"I do care about her, that's why I came to this anonymous wanking community and namedropped her after she made a friend-locked plurk talking about how stressed she was with life in general."

I really think if you think this is a good way to help or care for someone, you need to lean back and take another look there, anon. It sounds to me like you two need to go your separate ways if you think this is "giving a shit". This is normally the point of a relationship where someone needs to break off, if they see they're getting irritated to this extent. If you've given up on trying to communicate your frustration personally with her and what she does, I think you need to get away from her.