wankgate | 252: imagine all the tags sitting neglected in inboxes for this

ik this is wankgate but i have a lot of empathy for your situation anon. that's a hard place to be in

more on topic: this is it exactly. the terminally online/tiktok-diagnosed autistic ppl with low support needs are just perpetuating the old "i'm not autistic, i have asperger's" that for so long was how a lot of people w milder autism tried to separate themselves from those with higher impairment.

dda and there's also the fact that almost all of those terminally online autistic people live in mommy and daddy's basement with no job and never have to try to navigate the world, so they can't comprehend that for some people with autism life can actually be pretty difficult regardless of their specific level of impairment.

this times a million. or the folks who say that it isn't a disorder. no, it actively makes my life harder, and that's part of the diagnostic criteria. if it's not impairing you in some way, you don't have autism! wild!

hdu, my ~~excuse to complain about every minor discomfort~~ tiktok-informed self-diagnosis is completely valid!

well of course it's not a disorder, it doesn't impair my life in any way!

brb asking mom to make me nuggies because i'm hungry

it's not a disorder, it's SOCIETY that's disordered! i am a perfect shining star gem and should never ever be expected to change even the smallest thing about myself, ever

this is why i don't think self-diagnosis is valid on its face and that online communities SHOULD gatekeep; don't require proof of a medical dx, but at least say people who have received one are the expectation because most of the self-dx crowd is just weird. they're not dealing with an actual disorder, they're not having to deal with the foreign language of school and employment and shit. but i wouldn't dare admit that anywhere in namespace. i am sympathetic to it being expensive, but if you need accommodations you need the diagnosis. and if you don't, you are not impaired.

but how else am i supposed to win a gold at the oppression olympics

The struggle is felt. I'm feeling like maybe I do need more support than I thought I did, and that the people who know me are right to be concerned over it.

Acting like it's just "a difference", not a disability doesn't help people - especially adults who have a hard time getting the supports they need due to all the misconceptions out there.

^ this

no worries anon, we're all just regular people here even if we're loudly salty sometimes, I appreciate it.

it was years ago but I think a lot about that guy who tweeted a picture of his nonverbal brother grinning ear to ear, having a fun day at the zoo, and how he got ripped apart by the twitter autistic crowd because how dare it be implied he's nonverbal, that's a stereotype, he clearly just hasn't found the exact correct way to communicate in an allistic-adjacent fashion. It's like they can't stand to see autistic people existing who are more than just ~slightly quirky~

da but thinking functional labels are bad because everyone's support needs can change isn't the same thing as thinking everyone is the same or that nonverbal people don't exist, anon. many people have support needs on all "levels" at different times and that's why they're bad, not because of some weird twitter shit.

next you're going to tell me that ABA is good, actually.

the "weird twitter shit" is in fact, a deeply fucked up kind of lateral ableism within autistic communities that happens *a lot* and you are no going to make it disappear by being a pedant. there are people who exist who have level 3 support needs *at all times* and it should be possible to have conversations about how to meet those needs without getting immediately slapped with this "🤓 um, akshually, that's ableist" horseshit you're doing right now with your fully functional language capabilities on the internet

kindly go fuck yourself with a cactus, you cretin

the assumption i can talk because i can type kind of sucks, but i am now worried i will be turned into a did you assume my gender joke by pointing that out

I am talking about you being on the internet, typing full words, and you know it. do not be a fucking pedant as a gotcha, it's not cute.

please explain to me, oh enlightened and superior autistic person, what is the "polite" way to differentiate between "can hold down a stable job but struggles with emotional regulation/social cues and needs medication" and "nonverbal, non-typing individual who needs a round-the clock caretaker to feed, clothe, and administer medications"

answer quickly because i am describing to you my actual lived experience

me too you're kinda overreacting

i live in a group home, i cannot dress myself due to severe dyspraxia, i am on disability. i have a feeding tube. relax. people can type and still not have these other skills

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(Anonymous) - 2025-02-07 04:47 (UTC) - Expand

drive-by thank you for bringing this up

it's almost like some kind of... spectrum...

no way it MUST be a line from 1-3 no spectrum wheels allowed

Question: have you in the last 5 years had to navigate acquiring services for yourself or a loved one with autism?

Diagnosed levels are necessary to gain access to support services and accomodations. If your support needs change, then the thing to do is get reassessed and loop in your IEP/providers/therapists/etc.

ABA is today more of a blanket term and the only one recognized as an autism specific therapy. The self-diagnosed low needs autistic adults online like to spread horror stories about shock therapy and abuse as if this is standard and widely practiced. It is not. Your experience will of course vary from provider to provider but the consensus from my personal experience as well as a dozen other parents who I have spoken to who closely monitor their child's therapies is that it is essentially play therapy that doesn't even go so far as to pressure kids to stop stimming unless the stims are physically self-harming. What I've heard from every single person who has spoken out against ABA is... they have no personal experience with it, are parroting what they've heard in online echo chambers, have never talked to an ABA therapist or visited a clinic, and have self-diagnosed so late in life that they've never even had to navigate or educate themselves about current heathcare services for children with autism.

no i'm someone who was a victim of ABA in the 90s, so the veiled accusations are not great but not in the last five years no. i have heard that this new "good ABA" is a rumor and it still hurts people though.

i understand about the diagnosis thing though, i'm not the original anon i'm just not a fan.

you're literally the person who brought up ABA, which literally no one was talking about, as a veiled accusation of ableism

I have literally sat in on my kid's very unexciting ABA therapy. It is not a rumor. I'm sorry you've dealt with abuse in the past but my point is exactly that -- there is a huge disconnect between autistic adults who are colored by their traumatic experience 35 years ago and don't realize that things are changing, even if it far too slowly, for the autistic community.

i do have experience with it, though. it's far from something i picked up in an echo chamber. i'm very glad for your child though, genuinely!

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(Anonymous) - 2025-02-07 04:52 (UTC) - Expand

nayrt, but a former aba implementer

does your child receive discrete trial therapy sessions?
is your child subject to a feeding program/food desensitization therapy?
how does your child's school handle "behaviors?" do they believe in turning their back on the child and withholding all forms of attention until the child exhausts themself into calm?
is your child forced to make eye contact and acknowledge every "good morning" someone says to them before they're allowed to proceed on with their day?