245: Tone Death Rapture: Championship Edition : Tournament Edition

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Comments

MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

mod... singular?

but which mod

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

that mod

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

i hope they have a lot of peeves, they are going to be busy

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

for your mod pet peeve you have chosen a minor punctuation quibble?

really?

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

serious question here, not trolling, really need to know this because it's becoming an issue in my game

at what point does 'i have [insert mental health issue here]' cease to be an acceptable excuse for bad behavior? i just need to know where the line is between 'being understanding' and 'get out of jail free card'

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

the point at which it's actively harming someone else / someone else's fun, and you've exhausted reasonable accommodations.

ex: as a mod, you can try to offer options if someone's math dyslexia challenges them to keep track of and add up their monthly AC.

ex 2: you don't need to excuse someone who is aggressively ship pushing because they're so depressed right now, and this pairing is the only thing that gives them joy.

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

+1

OP

[(Anonymous)]

this actually helps a lot is really clear. thanks!

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

there is literally no mandatory or morally requisite tolerance for offensive and harmful behavior.

neither you nor your other players are obligated to be their mental health support network.

sa

[(Anonymous)]

"but what if it's not offensive and harmful" then why do you give a shit if it's from mental illness or not?

OP

[(Anonymous)]

i'm reluctant to go into much detail because i don't want to risk outing this person, but all i will say for now is that this person lashed out with aggressive language toward someone.

Re: OP

[(Anonymous)]

how aggressive is aggressive? are you sure they weren't provoked?

speaking as someone whose issues have caused me problems in games, the line has to be when they attack others. we have as much right as anyone to play in games and enjoy ourselves, it's great if you can accommodate and be understanding, but the point when someone is attacking others is a hard cutoff point where you have to put those others first.

Re: OP

[(Anonymous)]

we were given a screenshot. it was just a 'hey are you okay?' and absolutely did not warrant that kind of response unless there is indeed some kind of greater concept that neither party has deemed fit to share with us.

Re: OP

[(Anonymous)]

going to assume, given the premise of your initial question, that you've done due diligence and looked into the matter, and the only thing they've cited to their defense is that they were in a bad mental space at the time when they lashed out. now you're wondering whether you should give them a pass on that basis.

if someone was impacted (which it sounds as if they potentially did), take the attitude that intentions don't matter, and you have to decide consequences based on actions. strip out whether they meant to lash out, whether their mental health drove them to it, and land on the deed itself. does it, in isolation, warrant you taking mod action?

once you decide that, you can let the mental health consideration influence the extent and gravity of any potential punishment you apply.

da

[(Anonymous)]

frankly, mental health issues aren't an excuse for being an asshole to another player. think of it this way - if you let it slide, are you signaling that their mental issues give them carte blanche to be a dbag at anyone they want and blame it on bad brain? are you going to alienate the person they lashed out at / anyone else in your game who doesn't want to be yelled at?

i would give them a strike at minimum (depending on how aggressive their language was from a scale of inappropriately mean in a fraught ooc situation to cussing people out completely unprovoked.) what i would say is "I understand you have [mental health issue] but [name their behavior] hurts other players and creates a toxic game environment."

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

as soon as its a problem for you

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

I actually really love modding and I have a bunch of ideas I'd like to try turning into proper games. But I can't do it alone and finding other mods (especially other mods who will be proactive and not need constant supervision just to get their work done) is like pulling teeth.

I think it's been tried before and didn't take off but I wish there was some sort of mod community here where you could ask for advice and find comods.

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

i am having the same problem. a couple of my friends volunteered to help but i have had such bad experiences in the past with friends treating comod ship like an Honorary Friendship Title where their role is to make supportive noises over DM whenever I am struggling and abuse their power to play favourites.

i want to know my comods are able to keep up with whatever monthly responsibilities they commit to, and that they won't go mad with power, but i have no idea how to judge that in advance without doing weird job interview shit.

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

I like modding in every respect except writing events which is usually what people require from co mods. So I rarely volunteer.

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

my advice as a fellow mod who loves modding is: do it yourself. if you're worried about being overwhelmed by the amount of work required to run a game yourself, then limit the number of players allowed to app. if you don't think you have enough time to run a small game, then you definitely don't have enough time to run a large game, no matter how excited you are about your ideas.

"but that's why i want a co-mod!" co-mods are a bad idea in general for all the reasons you and the other anon mentioned. the best games i've been in have one head mod who is solely responsible for the game's plot and worldbuilding. they write the events, including the tdm. they answer faq questions. they advertise on plurk, respond to player concerns, are proactive and enthusiastic in the forward momentum of their game, and they delegate repetitive tasks to helper mods so they have more time for the above. helper mod duties can include moderating the discord group, coding aesthetics for the game, processing apps and activity check, and updating the taken/drop pages. helper mods are also great for bouncing ideas off of and getting second opinions from. often these helper mods are volunteers from players already in a game who intend to stick around.

with this arrangement, there's a clear division of power and responsibility between you and the other mods. if a helper mod isn't updating their list in a timely matter, then confront them kindly. they'll either get to work or step down, and if they step down, helper mods are far easier to replace than co-mods. like the other anon above said, finding co-mods who want to write and host interactive event posts with you is a big ask, and you'll have trouble finding anyone reliable because no one is going to be as excited and willing to put in the work for your game as you are.

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

I'm the above anon and tbh I do prefer being a support person rather than "in charge" so that there's a clear end vote from someone if there's ever dissent. I also don't mind writing event outlines! I just know that I'm not that good at writing an engaging event post with prompts people like so I'm hesitant to sign up when people are requiring that specifically. I'm really good at handling player complaints and staying on top of list work but I'm just not a strong event writer.

I think it's best to start with a head mod and maybe a helper mod or two and just recruit from players though, yeah.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

you sound like a great helper, anon. being willing to write event outlines and handling player complaints on top of other responsibilities is huge

Re: MOD'S PET PEEVES

[(Anonymous)]

If this worked for you that's cool, but I've tried this and it's exactly the sort of thing that burned me out.

Apps, lists, and AC are things I can do on autopilot and sometimes it's more tiring to have to manage and delegate tasks and follow up to make sure they're completed than it is to just take a minute and update the list myself.

Meanwhile, being solely responsible for the game's creative and interactive output is exhausting. It can be even more difficult at a small game than a large one because at large games players will have more options for keeping themselves busy with CR and player plots. I agree that it's a big ask for anyone to care about my game as much as I do, but that's why I wish it were easier to find people who'd build a game with me so it would be OUR game instead of just mine.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

this might be a "grass is always greener" situation. sharing a game with someone as a co-mod can come with its own problems. we've seen it here on wankgate where co-mods have stolen games from each other, complained about their fellow co-mods for being unreliable, or thrown their fellow co-mods under the bus when wank started.

personally, i choose potential burnout, because that's something i can control myself. i can make events lighter or less often, i can set an endgame date or move the endgame date forward, or i can discuss with the players about making the game into a sandbox or handing it over to a new mod from the current playerbase. i know it's disappointing as a player, but i don't consider any of these things failures when mods do them. they're being responsible rather than ghosting their game, and all games come to an end eventually.

finding a co-mod to share a game with equally is hard mode in many ways. i wish you luck, anon.